Hey Speech-Heads,
It’s no secret that my Speech Brother Eric B. and I love Creepy Talking Robots. Just the other day, we were sitting around the old campfire, shelling peanuts and talking about all the Creepy Talking Robots we’ve profiled over the years: strange, vaguely sexual gynoids with feathered blond hair and trampy speech recognition engines.
And then it happened. We encountered a CTR the likes of which we thought did not–nay could not, could never–exist. Prepare, Speech-Heads, for the absolute horror and lurid nightmare that is Roxxxy.
Who is Roxxxy, you ask? And why does she spell her name with three x’s? Because she is the world’s first Creepy Talking Sex Robot (CTSR). Built by New Jersey based TrueCompanion and engineered by Douglass Hines—founder/president of the company and former AI engineer at Bell Labs–Roxxxy TrueCompanion is described by the company as the “world’s first life-size robotic girlfriend.” And, yes: She talks.
After two years and between $500,000 and $1 million dollars, Roxxxy made her debut earlier this month at the AVN Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas—where, I have no doubt, she made quite a splash.
Standing at 5’ 7” and weighing in at 120 pounds, Roxxxy has flesh-like synthetic skin—I would like to note that while typing the words “flesh-like synthetic skin” I gagged and frightened one of the interns—and an artificial intelligence engine that can learn her owner/boyfriend’s likes and dislikes.
Featuring an articulated skeleton, Roxxxy can be positioned by her owner/boyfriend but can’t move her limbs independently. The same can be said, of course, for a dead body. But show me a dead body that boasts a mechanical heart that powers an internal liquid cooling system. Show me a dead body that can talk.
That’s right, Roxxxy—who offers five different personalities including Wild Wendy, Frigid Farrah, Mature Martha, and S&M Susan—can, according to TrueCompanion’s Website, “carry on a discussion and expresses her love to you and be your loving friend. She can talk to you, listen to you and feel your touch.”
Roxxy, who is priced at about $6,500, also features a program enabling her to talk with her owner/boyfriend via an internal loudspeaker, an updatable vocabulary, and customizable hair color, eye color, skin color and breast size.
In the interest of quality journalism, I visited the definitely NSFW www.truecompanion.com. Unfortunately, doing so set off all sorts of alarms here at The Home Office. But, I am happy to say, I was not fired, only issued several written warnings and told by my editor to “look at that sick [explicative] on you own time.”
However, my research was not in vain. I can report that TrueCompanion will soon be offering a male version of its CTSR named Rocky. And, like Roxxxy, Rocky will doubtlessly live up to the product’s tagline and be “always turned on and ready to talk or play.”
